Out Of Commission 114 – My Sexual Gladiator


Alright, I enter into the arena…its dark but the ground is swelling with thundering dance music. I arrive on a litter held up by 6 ripped studs with neon bronze masks. My champions are in front of me having recently existed from the shower which still glows under blacklight. They have been stripped save for plastic transparent thongs. they are kissing. One by one they try to win my favor by well you can imagine……. in this no longer trying to hide it, all out homosexual escapist fantasy episode of Out of Commission, we return to the sexual coliseum with and orgy of violence and latex jelly. Aside from the dull flap of a thousand writhing bodies, we also discuss the Prometheus, Killer ATMS, and how hot Glen close looks in drag. Yep, no way I am getting out of that comment. Here the excitment spill out as Epileptic Peat and George Force, punch themselves in the leg during Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy. Here sorid tales of Kaptain Carbon not giving 80 year old Tom Cruise his due in Mission Impossible 4 . Here, give me your pen :: scribble :: do you recognize this stick figure?





Written, Produced, Recorded, Edited and Posted by Kaptain Carbon
Collage by Kaptain Carbon
Created by George Force and Epileptic Peat under the supervision of Kaptain Carbon
Copyright Kaptain Carbon 2011

Out Of Commission 113 – A Very Merry Contrarian Christmas


Hahah thank you, no really I needed new razors and I was was just thinking how I should listen to Blink 182. I didn’t even know they had a new album. Ohh your apart of a monthly music subscription. Cool. yeah I’m sure we have lots to talk about. Thanks Aunt Stacey for Season 3 of Glee, Ill be sure to catch up on old episodes before settling in with this. And what can I say to this one…wow…thanks for the 15 dollar Olive Garden gift certificate. Hopefully I don’t fill up on those dern bread sticks. In this claw at your face to escape familial obligations episode of Out Of Commission, we hang our stockings on the chimney with care and wait for Santa to rightfully give us what we damn deserve. George Force dreams of sugarplums and the day when he will have viable internet outside of a parking lot. Epileptic Peat may end up on the naughty list due to first degree public battery and Kaptain Carbon finally finds the meaning of Christmas in fictional genre films. It is our Holiday episode and it tastes like Egg Nog cinnmon and plastic mistletoe. Crunch those toes on the carpet and shoot your damn eye out because nothing says holiday fun like a trip on Rape Island.




Written, Produced, Recorded, Edited and Posted by Kaptain Carbon
Collage by Kaptain Carbon
Created by George Force and Epileptic Peat under the supervision of Kaptain Carbon
Copyright Kaptain Carbon 2011

Out Of Commission 112 – Live…From George’s Car


I’m just saying if I had to pick two male actors to fight in a sci fi laser gladiator arena for my affection as their king, it is in no way homosexual at all. In this most likely homosexual episode of Out Of Commission, we sit around in our jammies, eat popcorn, put on avocado masks and practice kissing on kaptain Carbon’s stack of GQ magazines. George joins us live from the backseat powering this podcast via the 711 snacks on his passenger seat. You just cant beat those taquito prices and they come in so many flavors, yeah give me three of those buffalo ones there no not that one…the fresh one andddddddd a pack of newports, 5 powerball tickets and how much soda will fit into my fizzinator mug. While Kaptain Carbon may be drunk and Epileptic Peat talking into a keyboard, Out Of Commission is ready to bring you the news in the most haphazard clusterfucking way possible. Do you know what I like? When guys take a dump in their pants and wait just the right amount of time to change out of their soiled undergarments. mmmmmmmm. I want that one. No not you, yes you, the one walking like a poopy cowboy.


George Force’s Blog
Kaptain Carbon’s Music Reviews (Pinpoint Music)
Kaptain Carbon’s Metal Reviews (CoC)
Epileptic Peat’s Music

Call us: 661-WARPATH
Email: sweeptheleg(at)Warpath(dot)tv

Written, Produced, Recorded, Edited and Posted by Kaptain Carbon
Collage by Kaptain Carbon
Created by George Force and Epileptic Peat under the supervision of Kaptain Carbon
Copyright Kaptain Carbon 2011

Out of Commission 111 – Six Days, Seven Suge Knights


Listen is there anyway that our customers can click on a button and automatically be enrolled in a paper newsletter? Isn’t their address already subscribed in the computer? Can all of these links float in little animated balloons so when you pop them they fall into a birthday cake? Its really important we have this. In this Well?! just what the hell am I paying you for? episode of Out Of Commission, we literally stab our own eyeballs if we get another email about the rollerover links. Listen in awe as we recount the Chopping Mall rumors. Tremble with fear as we discuss Rocky: the Musical!. Touch yourself, when no one is looking, as we travel back to the horny adolescence days of pre-internet. Yes sir, I got the email, but there is literally no way I can scan a mirror to make the background be reflective for the customers. Yes, I know you want the links to turn into cats when the mouse…which is also a mouse… touches them. Yes I know I got the part about the cat playing with the mouse. Yes I realize that mouse means to different things. Yes, it should work with AOL.

HACK THE PLANET




George Force’s Blog
Kaptain Carbon’s Music Reviews (Pinpoint Music)
Kaptain Carbon’s Metal Reviews (CoC)
Epileptic Peat’s Music

Call us: 661-WARPATH
Email: sweeptheleg(at)Warpath(dot)tv

Written, Produced, Recorded, Edited and Posted by Kaptain Carbon
Collage by Kaptain Carbon
Created by George Force and Epileptic Peat under the supervision of Kaptain Carbon
Copyright Kaptain Carbon 2011

Out of Commission 110 – Tycoonasarus Rex


So the passengers will be strapped onto mechanical bumblebees and then transported to a magical land of Triassic wonder. In this innovative amusement park episode of Out Of Commission, we plot out our new future as entertainment moguls. We also try to feign excitement at the news of the Fly 2, 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea and the new season of Arrested Development. Our audio is crystal clear so prepare yourselves for amazing adventures. Also at the end of this episode is a special sneak preview of the new Warpath TV podcast Champions Of The Universe starring Kaptain Carbon, Area Man and Handsome Chris. They will be discussing music you never heard of but pretend to know at parties. Jo-Pa forever….well, not really.



George Force’s Blog
Kaptain Carbon’s Music Reviews (Pinpoint Music)
Kaptain Carbon’s Metal Reviews (CoC)
Epileptic Peat’s Music

Call us: 661-WARPATH
Email: sweeptheleg(at)Warpath(dot)tv

Written, Produced, Recorded, Edited and Posted by Kaptain Carbon
Collage by Kaptain Carbon
Created by George Force and Epileptic Peat under the supervision of Kaptain Carbon
Copyright Kaptain Carbon 2011

Out of Commission 109 – Pregnancy Scare


Please Lord. don’t let her be pregnant. I’m sorry for what ever I did, If you make this right, I’ll promise ill do good. Ill go to church once a week and give to the poor. Please Lord, do me this solid. In this suddenly religious episode of Out Of Commission, we face the music like men and cry our eyes out like the boys we want to be. Adam Area Man joins us for another rousing episode of trailers, comics and conspiracies involving Patrick Swyaze and an Illuminati cover up. You may notice a slight drop in sound quality at the beginning of the episode. That corrects itself in no time and we did it to be artsy so fuck you. All I’m saying is you really need to start reading the new JLA series as well as Batwoman to really get what is going on.




George Force’s Blog
Kaptain Carbon’s Music Reviews (Pinpoint Music)
Kaptain Carbon’s Metal Reviews (CoC)
Epileptic Peat’s Music

Call us: 661-WARPATH
Email: sweeptheleg(at)Warpath(dot)tv

Written, Produced, Recorded, Edited and Posted by Kaptain Carbon
Collage by Kaptain Carbon
Created by George Force and Epileptic Peat under the supervision of Kaptain Carbon
Copyright Kaptain Carbon 2011

Out of Commission 108 – Zentai


So did you guys see that new movie? Yeah its pretty lame. Look it up sometime and I’ll call you and we can continue this conversation. In this skin tight episode of Out Of Commission, we suit up in our florescent body suits and engage in everyday activities. Epileptic Peat is the only one who brought his homework this week and he accidentally did all the problems instead of the odd. Ooops sorry about that. Loser. We all dog pile on top of the new 21 Jump Street Movie, Kate Beckinsale’s return to the Underworld franchise and a new movie with DnZ Washington. You know what makes me mad? Having people pay tribute to my career whilst using a high pitched impersonation of my voice. Also socks, why can’t I buy just one? Wouldn’t it be cheaper to sell them individually. What am I going to do with 6 socks?




George Force’s Blog
Kaptain Carbon’s Music Reviews (Pinpoint Music)
Kaptain Carbon’s Metal Reviews (CoC)
Epileptic Peat’s Music

Call us: 661-WARPATH
Email: sweeptheleg(at)Warpath(dot)tv

Written, Produced, Recorded, Edited and Posted by Kaptain Carbon
Collage by Kaptain Carbon
Created by George Force and Epileptic Peat under the supervision of Kaptain Carbon
Copyright Kaptain Carbon 2011

Out of Commission 107 – Our Big Gay Podcast


I’m just saying. What your doing is similar to a sexual orientation millions of people choose to identify with. That’s right, the Famas in Black Ops is totally gay and so are you. Gay Gay. In this sexually progressive episode of Out Of Commission, we open ourselves up for suggestions and subject ourselves to the latest round of movie news. George Force is the only one who brought his homework this week so Kaptain Carbon and Epileptic Peat are staying after class to clap erasers. We may or may not talk about Phantom Menace 3D, Jurassic Park 4 and Fast 6,7,8. We may or may not revert back to 4th graders and throw around insults before going out to recess. You cant play with us anymore. You don’t know how to quick scope. Gay.


George Force’s Blog
Kaptain Carbon’s Music Reviews (Pinpoint Music)
Kaptain Carbon’s Metal Reviews (CoC)
Epileptic Peat’s Music

Call us: 661-WARPATH
Email: sweeptheleg(at)Warpath(dot)tv

Written, Produced, Recorded, Edited and Posted by Kaptain Carbon
Collage by Kaptain Carbon
Created by George Force and Epileptic Peat under the supervision of Kaptain Carbon
Copyright Kaptain Carbon 2011

Out of Commission 106 – Edward Allen Winslow Poe


I knew he never wrote anything. I’m seriously thinking about calling up my high school or going to the principal and seeing if I can get a written apology or even some money for all those F’s I got in Brit Lit. No shit man I’ll do it. Think about all those hours I wasted studying something that wasn’t even written by the guy who they said it was. Its all government bullshit. I wont stand for this. Just you see. In this Deceptively Literary Episode of Out Of Commission we crack the books and get all academic over that sweet studious yet sexually uninhibited ass. Edgar Allan Poe CSI becomes the new movie day for 7th period, Law and Order: 1592 becomes the hot show for lonely secretaries and The Avengers finally gets a trailer. You might as well accept it. Listen in earnest as Epileptic Peat gets once step closer getting his lips attached to his nose, Kaptain Carbon eats his food in the corner and George force tires his hardest to make us turn around and face the zeppelin which will kill us all. We also talk about movies with the grace of a drunken dentist. Episode 106…Day 1 after the Rapture. Goodnight.

George Force’s Blog
Kaptain Carbon’s Music Reviews (Pinpoint Music)
Kaptain Carbon’s Metal Reviews (CoC)
Epileptic Peat’s Music

Call us: 661-WARPATH
Email: sweeptheleg(at)Warpath(dot)tv

Written, Produced, Recorded, Edited and Posted by Kaptain Carbon
Collage by Kaptain Carbon
Created by George Force and Epileptic Peat under the supervision of Kaptain Carbon
Copyright Kaptain Carbon 2011

Out of Commission 105 – #OccupyOutOfCommision


I’m just saying if you ever paid for a girl during a date that’s just the same as hiring a little company from the back of this newspaper. Listen its not “illegal,” it is just two adults exchanging money for services. Its just like dropping your laundry off. Money and services. Come on. Can I have your credit card or what? In this Red Light Episode of Out Of Commission we intellectually justify a very horrible mistake which will cripple us for the rest of our lives. We also discuss Killer Elite…which may have done the same thing. Listen in awe as we rally support and storm the streets of less important places than New York! Gasp as Epileptic Peat is trapped by five glasses of orange juice! Snicker quietly as all three of us turn into a dysfunctional family during Thanksgiving when trying to read movie news! It is going to be fun, hilarious and slightly felonious. Listen, its not “controlled substances,” its more like “party favors.” Stop being a puritanical cock block, daddy needs to get his pipes flushed.

George Force’s Blog
Kaptain Carbon’s Music Reviews (Pinpoint Music)
Kaptain Carbon’s Metal Reviews (CoC)
Epileptic Peat’s Music

Call us: 661-WARPATH
Email: sweeptheleg(at)Warpath(dot)tv

Written, Produced, Recorded, Edited and Posted by Kaptain Carbon
Collage by Kaptain Carbon
Created by George Force and Epileptic Peat under the supervision of Kaptain Carbon
Copyright Kaptain Carbon 2011